Which is better...to be a person who has a "transparent" face (meaning that he/she reveals what they are thinking by the look on the face, whether it is disapproval or joy or concern) or to be a person who has a poker face (meaning that the look on the face reveals nothing about what they are thinking)? I have been asking my friends this question all weekend because it hit me sometime in the last few days that I have a very transparent face! According to my family and several friends, you can gage my approval or disapproval just by the look on my face...and I'm appalled! I want a poker face! I don't want my face to betray my thoughts, my feelings or my reactions, especially when my reaction is going to offend the very person I am talking to!
One friend suggests that I should "go for transparency. It's honest and efficient, though riskier (be ready to deal with the consequences of an honest look). I have found that most people appreciate others who don't hide their reactions." I had not considered this aspect before--perhaps people appreciate my (blatant) honesty! But another trusted friend, on the other hand, allows that sometimes you need that poker face, as well: "Most of the time I go for transparent but if you are trying to minister to people sometimes you have to have a poker face. You have to hate the sin but not show shock at what they are wearing or doing to reach them." Good point! And that is my greatest concern--that my face is somehow communicating my judgment ...and we're not supposed to be judging others! I don't intend to hurt feelings or convey my disappointment, but apparently I do, and how can this be a good thing?
How do I learn to have a poker face?
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